How to Apply the Baby Whisperer's Sleep Method (with Pictures) (2024)

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Co-authored byJulie Wright, MFT

Last Updated: April 9, 2024Approved

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1. 1

   Understand the problem. Infants struggle to regulate their own sleep cycles, and new parents often do not know how to best teach their infant to sleep through the night.

   • Some people, most notably Richard Ferber (creator of "the Ferber method), have advocated letting infants cry for increasing intervals to help them teach themselves to self-sooth. But this method has been very controversial, and when taken to extremes (with babies left to cry for extended periods of time) it can cause psychological stress and health problems in the child.
   • Other professionals have advocated methods of attachment parenting, such as co-sleeping, nursing to sleep, and rocking to sleep, which sometimes make it difficult for the mother to get any rest.
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   Learn about the philosophy. Tracy Hogg, author of "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer," felt that letting babies cry themselves to sleep and providing too much attention at bedtime were both extremes that should be avoided. Her method is intended to be a moderate middle ground between extreme cry-it-out methods and extreme attachment parenting.^[1]

   • The Baby Whisperer Sleep Method involves a strict day and nighttime routine for babies so that their bodies naturally adjust to bedtime at the right time. It also involves learning the baby's cues and how to communicate with the baby, so that the parent knows when the baby is tired.
   • The method must be adapted depending on the age of the baby. No sleep method at all should be used in the first three months of life, when the newborn sleeps excessively and does not participate much in play or interaction.

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   Learn about the E.A.S.Y. method. The acronym represents the stages of a strictly structured routine, which is the basis of this sleep method.

   • E stands for Eat. When a baby first wakes up from a nap or bedtime, the first thing you should do feed the baby. Whether it's a snack or a full blown meal (milk or solids, depending on the age), it's important that this is the first step.^[2]
   • A stands for Activities. After eating it's time to play, run errands, or do any other activities that are not eating or sleeping. The amount of time spent doing activities will vary depending on the child's age, as very young infants cannot play for long without becoming tired, but older infants and toddlers can often go several hours.
   • S stands for Sleep. It's important that sleep directly follows activities, because the child has played until he or she begins to show signs of tiredness, and then transitions directly to sleeping without nursing or having a bottle. According to Hogg, bottles and nursing to sleep provide "props" that a baby relies on to fall asleep, preventing the baby from learning how to self-sooth.^[3]
   • Y stands for You Time, and it's what you get when you follow the rest of the routine.
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   Learn about "pick up/put down" (pu/pd). The EASY routine provides the structural framework in which the sleep method itself must exist, but perhaps the heart of the method itself is the philosophy behind pu/pd.

   • When a baby is placed in her bed for naptime or bedtime, she may quietly "talk" to herself, fall asleep, or cry. If she cries, the caregiver goes to her and picks her up, then practices a number of "Four S" techniques meant to sooth the baby. These include:
     • Set the stage: This involves the bedtime routine, and it should be the same for every sleep period and no longer than five minutes total. This is a winding down period that serves as a cue to the baby that it is now time to go to sleep. For example, you might change the baby's diaper, close the curtains, turn off the light, sing a certain song, and say a specific sleepy phrase (for example, "time to go night night").
     • Swaddling: Not all babies like to be swaddled, but if yours does, this is one technique that can help sooth her to sleep.
     • Sitting quietly with the baby.
     • Shush-pat: This method works best for younger infants, and involves a firm pat in the center of the baby's back in the pattern of a heartbeat (pat-pat, pat-pat) accompanied by a "shhhh" sound that is quite loud to distract the baby from its own crying.
   • After the baby is calmed (but likely still awake), the caregiver puts her down into her crib and then leaves the room. The caregiver repeats this process (pick up, sooth, put down) as many times as needed to gently encourage sleep.^[4]

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1. 1

   Plan a routine. The routine's elements-- eating, playing and sleeping, in that order-- are non-negotiable. But the length of each element will vary depending on your baby's needs.

   • Observe the time that your baby tends to naturally rise for the day. This will be the starting point of your daily routine.
   • Remember, Hogg calls it a "routine" and not a "schedule" for a reason. A schedule implies that you do things at the same time every day. A routine, however, implies the same order and structure, but not necessarily the same time or length of time for each element on the routine. You can be flexible with the routine by lengthening or shortening some of the elements throughout the day, but you must stick with the order consistently from day to day.
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   Feed the baby. This is the first step as soon as the baby wakes in the morning (you may need to change a diaper first). It's a logical first step because a baby who wakes from a long sleep period needs sustenance immediately.

   • At this age, you should feed the baby either breastmilk or formula only. Most babies 3-6 months old eat between 3-8 ounces of formula at each feeding.^[5] If your baby is breastfed, you won't know how many ounces, but you will feed your baby until she is no longer interested in actively nursing. As long as she is having regular wet and dirty diapers, and is gaining weight appropriately, you know she is getting the right amount of milk.
   • Generally, at this age feeding the baby will likely take around 30 minutes or so.
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   Play. After mealtime is finished, it's time for activities to stimulate the baby prior to another period of sleep. Well rested now and with a dry diaper and a full stomach, your baby can focus on the important activities that help her motor, cognitive, and social skills to blossom.

   • The activities should vary and can consist of tummy time, looking at picture books, going for a walk outside, and other age-appropriate ways of stimulating the baby. The length of the play period will vary depending on your baby's attention span (which gets longer with age) and level of tiredness, and will most likely end with changing your baby's diaper.
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   Put the baby down for a nap. With a full tummy and a dry diaper, your baby should be ready for a nap. At 3 months, a baby will need 5 hours of sleep during the day and 10 hours at night.

   • Lay the baby down to sleep in her crib when she shows signs of tiredness. Follow a bedtime routine regardless of the time of day by keeping activity to a minimum and by providing peaceful surroundings.
   • Remain consistent with the sleep routine. The pattern of how to apply the Baby Whisperer's sleep method should be the same for naps as it is for nighttime.
   • If your baby cries, offer comfort. Begin with shushing sounds. If your baby remains fussy, gently pat her back to calm cries. If this isn't enough, pick her up but don't hold her longer than 2 or 3 minutes at a time. Put her all the way back down for the same amount of time and repeat the process until she is calm.
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   Listen to your baby. Throughout the routine, your baby's cries, movements, noises, shouts or other vocalizations and body language are her way of speaking to you before she can talk. With time and practice, you will learn to decipher various behaviors and cries, which is a vital step in recognizing when she wants to eat, play, and sleep. Using this information, you should adjust the length of time that you spend at each of the stages of the routine (eat, play, and sleep).

   • Steady, rhythmic cries signify hunger. If you hear this sound during a sleep period, it's time to feed the baby. Babies of this age do not typically sleep through the night without eating.
   • High-pitched, sudden cries along with jerky movements can indicate pain or discomfort. Rather than just offering comfort, you should check your baby to be sure no parts of the body are in pain or injured.
   • Tired babies may rub their eyes, yawn or blink. When you begin to see these signs during activity time, it's time to transition to sleep time. Sometimes activity time will be shorter than others, depending on how tired your baby is from different amounts of stimulation.^[6]
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   Repeat the routine throughout the day. You will need to adjust for length-- some babies take a short morning nap and two longer afternoon naps, and some babies thrive on perfectly spaced naps of equal length.

   • Most babies at this age take three naps of about 5 hours and sleep a total of about 10 hours at night.^[7]
   • It may take days or even weeks of utilizing the EASY method and the pu/pd sleep method before your baby adjusts and accepts the routine. According to the author of the method, it is vital that you follow through with the method, rather than giving up if your baby resists. However, you should always discuss any trouble with your baby's sleep or behavior with your pediatrician to ensure that there are no underlying problems like acid reflux or colic.

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1. 1

   Adjust the routine as your baby grows. While the elements of the routine stay the same (eat, play, sleep, in that order), the length of the elements and the strategies you might use will vary as your child becomes more aware, interactive, and alert during the day and more conscious of your absence at night.

   • At 6 months old, most babies should not need a nighttime feeding, especially if he/she is eating solid food during the day.
   • When your baby begins to sleep through the night, you can stretch the period of activity to 2 to 2.5 hours of playtime between naps. There will also be times when you may need to be flexible with the schedule, such as vacations or when you need to run errands that take longer than 2 hours.
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   Watch for your baby's cues before you pick her up. During nap or bedtime, babies of this age often "talk" to themselves or babble, or cry out of tiredness to help themselves fall asleep. It's important that you don't rush to her before she has had a chance to settle in for sleep. Listen to the sound of the cry.

   • The most common signal that she wants to be comforted is your child holding out her hands to you. When you pick her up, hold her in a horizontal position and say soothing words before placing her back in the crib.
   • If she gets more upset, walk away from her crib and avoid eye contact. You may be a distraction.
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   Introduce a transitional item. At this age, your baby has become more aware of your absence and may benefit from an item that can help comfort and sooth her to sleep, such as a small, soft blanket or favorite sleep-safe toy.

   • If possible, try to use the same object at every nap and bedtime, and try to keep the toy or blanket in the bed only. This way, the baby will learn to associate the transitional item with sleep and not with playtime, and will be more likely to use it to sooth herself to sleep rather than playing in the bed.

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1. 1

   Continue to adjust the routine as needed. This means you will continue to increase the amount of playtime and activity, while reducing daytime naps. Always watch for your baby's signals so you will have a better understanding of what your child needs.

   • From around 8 months to a year, your child should still be taking 2 naps a day. Most babies only need one nap after a year, but you should know from your baby's tired signals and alertness while playing whether she is ready to eliminate one nap.
   • Naps may range from 20 minutes to several hours, depending on the baby. Continue to watch the baby's cues.
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   Begin allowing your child to settle down on her own. Lay her down in the crib and walk away. Don't pick her up unless she gets very upset.

   • A baby monitor may be especially helpful at this stage. If you see that your baby has become so upset that she sits or stands, go into her room, pick her up and then lay her back down facing away from you.
   • If your baby isn't calming down on her own, leave her lying in her crib (rather than picking her up) and say comforting things. Babies of this age understand quite a bit of language, so you might use a soothing phrase like "Mama's here. It's night time baby," which you can use consistently at every sleep time to help the baby adjust to sleep. You may place your hand on her back for a few minutes.
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   Listen when your baby cries out at night before you immediately rush to her. She may be able to soothe herself.

   • Nighttime cries or calls are part of the normal sleep cycle, even for adults who often talk in their sleep. Since babies can't talk, they often grunt, moan, yell, or cry while still sleeping. If you go in and comfort the baby at this point, it will actually backfire by waking the baby more and disturbing the sleep cycle.
   • If the cries escalate or seem unusual, go and comfort your baby.

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