Couple shares bed with daughters 6 and 12. How old is too old to co-sleep with parents? (2024)

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Couple shares bed with daughters 6 and 12. How old is too old to co-sleep with parents? ›

“McKenzi is extremely independent.” According to Liz Nissim-Matheis, a clinical psychologist in New Jersey, it's best to end co-sleeping when a person reaches puberty, or at around 11.

Parents should introduce sleeping in their own spaces as early as five years old. This is when they are fully grown, and still young enough to get used to the norm of having their bed and space.

Recent studies showed that many children co-sleep with their parents. It was noted that 45 percent of mothers co-sleep with their 8 to 12 years old children occasionally, and 13 percent of mothers do it daily.

Dr. Basora-Rovira says there is no specific age that is “too old” for co-sleeping. She encourages parents to not begin practicing co-sleeping in the first place. And, if you are already co-sleeping with your child, to transition him or her out of your bed and into his or her own room as soon as possible.

"I wouldn't want a 14-year-old child sleeping in the bed with his or her mother or father. If you asked me to draw a line, I think it's at the prepubertal time," Fisk said. Matheis agrees. "Adolescence, or the onset of puberty, may be a good time to transition to different beds," she said.

It can be illegal for two minors to have sex. In some states, having sexual intercourse with someone who is under the age of consent is always treated as statutory rape. In other states, however, there is an exemption to statutory rape for when two people who are close in age have consensual sex.

Forty-five percent of moms let their 8- to 12-year-olds sleep with them from time to time, and 13 percent permit it every night. A child's anxiety, lower self-esteem, and dependency behaviors during the daytime are related to their inability to sleep alone at night.

DEAR SLEEPING: Although it is common for some parents to share their bed with infants or toddlers, it is far less so for a father and his teenage daughter. Jenna is no longer a child, and frankly, to continue this practice is inappropriate and potentially stimulating for both of them.

Persistent bedsharing through first six years associated with 70% higher chance of psychiatric disorder and 110% higher risk of internalizing problems (n=4,231)

Barclay notes that there's nothing wrong with letting your child sleep with you, if you decide to go that route. "Many families in other cultures sleep together," she says. "If this works for you and your family, then it's perfectly fine." On the other hand, the family bed isn't for everyone.

How does co-sleeping affect your child later? ›

On average, children who bedshare do tend to transition to sleeping independently about a year later than other children, but they may be more independent, self-reliant, and confident in their daily lives than children who did not bedshare.

In many co-sleeping situations, there comes a time when parents, children, or both “outgrow” the arrangement. It tends to happen organically.

And then there was the terrifyingly titled 2021 study published in the journal Behavioral Sleep Medicine: “Early Childhood Co-Sleeping Predicts Behavior Problems in Pre-Adolescence.” Researchers followed 1,565 Chinese children between the ages of 3 to 5 from early childhood into pre-adolescence.

According to Liz Nissim-Matheis, a clinical psychologist in New Jersey, it's best to end co-sleeping when a person reaches puberty, or at around 11. “Once we get into that territory of bodies changing, that's when you really want to take a step back and say, 'What is going on here?

Co-sleeping- a way to give children security

Others claim that co- sleeping can make your child more secure- with good sleep as a result. It is not unusual that children in different ages sleep uneasy and they can sleep more calmly by sleeping nearby their parents the whole night, even when they are a little older.

Transitioning from co-sleeping with parents to sleeping alone in a crib can cause separation anxiety. Some studies suggest that co-sleeping babies have less anxiety, higher self-esteem, and are more comfortable with affection.

If you are co-sleeping with a baby who is under 12 months, we would recommend getting them sleeping in their own bed again as soon as possible. Over 12 months, the risk of SIDs - sudden unexplained infant death, decreases, so there is less urgency in stopping co-sleeping.

On average, a co-sleeper can be used until your baby is about 6 months old. But this can vary by brand. Always adhere to the maximum age recommended by the manufacturer. And always switch to a crib if your little one can sit upright or on his knees.

Beginning at the age of 1, co-sleeping is generally considered safe. In fact, the older a child gets, the less risky it becomes, as they are more readily able to move, roll over, and free themselves from restraint.

– That being said, the American Academy of Pediatrics states that five years is the youngest age for unsupervised bathing, although ages 6 and 7 are usually when children are able to properly clean their bodies and wash their hair themselves in the shower.